identifying with a dung beetle

Ok- I know that writing about an insect that eats poop to survive is an odd way to launch my blogging career, but here we are.

I was right at the beginning of my journey with reopening The Kitchen at Selah Space when I found myself watching a nature documentary that took place in the African desert. To preface where I was at mentally- let’s just say- I was a mess. I found it impossible not to feel completely overwhelmed by the idea of starting my business back up when I had already failed once. The pandemic that had taken my business from newly opened to newly closed in a matter of months had not gone anywhere. Fear and uncertainty were familiar feelings, and I was still not comfortable living with them.

So here I was, taking a moment of mindless peace to watch a simple nature documentary. Enter the dung beetle. If you’re not familiar with this creature, it’s just what it sounds like. A beetle that eats poop. This particular dung beetle was rolling droppings from other animals into little balls that would be her food source, and attempting to roll it up a sand dune to get it to her home. She used her tiny back legs to push the ball up this massive hill- backwards and not able to see where she was going. She was ALMOST over the hill when she lost control and tumbled down the hill with her ball of poop.

I was devastated for this little beetle. She had put in so much work, and was nearly to the top, and now all of her progress was gone. When the documentary informed me that she would be unable to attempt her journey again because the hot sand would literally burn her to death- I lost it. Poor thing. But she carried on. They left the beetle behind and we never heard much else of her story, but I’m assuming she continued about her way- collecting poop and trying to survive.

The glamourous dung beetle with its ball of survival 🤢

If you haven’t guessed it yet- I took this little glimpse into the life of this insect as a direct reflection of my life currently. Rolling a ball of survival- backwards, up a hill, no way of knowing where I’m going, no way of knowing if it will be a success or if it may kill me, and I’ve definitely taken a tumble. I had put all of my trust into my instinct to survive (to make my business survive). I have no idea if starting over again will get me the results I need, but I have instinctual faith in the need for this community that has been created. Yes, I put in a lot of work that felt like it ended in a complete failure. Yes, I’m really tired and struggling from the effects of that failure. However, unlike this beetle, I am in the perfect environment to thrive within the sands of what was and what isn’t anymore. I have a business partner- and an entire community- that will help guide me as I navigate this familiar journey. I have access to resources that see my fear and my uncertainty as opportunities to grow and become a healthier business owner and human being.

So if you really resonated with the poop-eating bug today- maybe it’s time to seek out a community that can support you through this time of rolling uphill blindly. The Kitchen and Selah Space are here for you through your survival journey, so you can keep those little back legs moving!